Is couples therapy in Pasadena right for your relationship? We crawled though forums and reviews to give you the common issues that cause people to start couples therapy in Pasadena.

If you’re reading this, chances are your relationship feels like it’s hit a wall. Maybe you’re caught in a cycle of arguments that never resolve, or perhaps there’s a quiet distance growing between you and your partner that you can’t quite explain. You might feel overwhelmed, confused, or even a little ashamed for wondering if therapy could help. First, let me say this: you’re not alone in feeling this way. Relationships are messy, and right now, you’re probably wrestling with some big questions about what’s normal and whether seeking help is the right move.

Here’s what might be running through your mind:

• Is my relationship really in trouble, or is this just a rough patch? 
• Are we the only couple struggling like this? 
• Will therapy actually fix anything, or is it just a waste of time? 
• What if my partner thinks therapy is ridiculous and won’t go? 
• How do I even find someone in Pasadena who can help us?

These doubts are totally valid. And they often come up because something in your relationship feels off—enough to make you wonder if couples therapy might be the answer.

Signs that point couples toward starting couples therapy

• Endless arguments over little stuff, like who’s supposed to do the dishes. 
• A disconnect that’s left you feeling more like roommates than lovers. 
• Trust issues—maybe from infidelity or just a nagging sense of doubt. 
• Conversations that always end in frustration because you can’t get through to each other. 
• A drop-off in intimacy, leaving you lonely even when you’re together. 
• Big fights about money, kids, or the future that keep coming up unresolved.

If any of this hits home, take a deep breath. These struggles don’t mean your relationship is doomed—they mean you’re human. And here’s the thing: plenty of couples in Pasadena are dealing with the exact same stuff. You might look around at the happy faces at Old Town cafes or the Rose Bowl and think everyone else has it together, but that’s not the full story. Behind closed doors, many are quietly wondering, “Is it normal to need help?” Spoiler: yes, it absolutely is. Seeking therapy isn’t a red flag—it’s a sign you’re ready to fight for what matters. In a bustling place like Pasadena, where life’s pressures can amplify relationship stress, turning to a professional isn’t just common; it’s smart.

We did the research: Here’s what Pasadena Couples are Saying

We searched forums and reviews that featured Pasadena couples looking for therapy. These are real reviews and comments on real experiences—not polished therapist websites. Then we grouped comments into categories so you can see the kinds of issues Pasadena couples are facing.

Here’s what each reason looks like, complete with a quote from a real person, an overview of the core issue, a daily example, and the core EFT skill that can help.

#1: Heated Arguments

Pasadena Couples on Heated Arguments:

“We can’t even discuss dinner plans without yelling. It’s exhausting.” 

How do heated arguments impact couples?

When communication breaks down, small misunderstandings can snowball into major conflicts and heated arguments. Couples might feel like they’re speaking different languages, leaving them frustrated and disconnected. They might yell or have difficulty resolving an argument. For some couples, the same heated argument comes up over and over with no real resolution.

For example, one partner tries to plan a weekend getaway, suggesting a beach trip. The other, feeling ignored, snaps, “You never consider what I want!” Instead of resolving it, the discussion spirals into a shouting match about unrelated past issues. 

What skill helps with heated arguments?

Couples with heated arguments need the safety to slow down and express the emotions beneath the surface—like feeling unappreciated or afraid of being dismissed. This shift is what EFT calls moving from “secondary affect” to “primary affect”. This shift helps them respond to each other’s deeper needs instead of just the words being thrown around, increasing connection and affection.

#2: Infidelity

Pasadena Couples on Infidelity:

“After they cheated, I want to move on, but I can’t stop doubting them.” 

How does infidelity impact couples?

Trust is the bedrock of a relationship, and when it’s shattered—whether by infidelity or smaller betrayals—the emotional fallout can feel like an open wound. Couples in this situation on average spend up to 5 years (if without therapy) resolving the issue, if it doesn’t end the relationship.

One partner might compulsively check the other’s phone, haunted by the fear of being hurt again. Even a simple “I’ll be late from work” text can spark tension, suspicion, and a cold silence that lasts all night. 

What skill helps couples repair from infidelity?

Therapy will help both partners learn to face the pain head-on. The one who broke trust learns to own the damage and offer consistent reassurance, while the hurt partner voices their need for safety. Together, they rebuild a secure attachment step by step. It involves the difficult but important work of expressing emotionally without suppressing, and taking responsibility without being overwhelmed by shame.

#3: Intimacy and Sex issues

Pasadena Couples on Intimacy and Sex:

“We haven’t touched each other in weeks. I don’t know how to bring it up.” 

How do problems with intimacy and sex impact couples?

Intimacy goes beyond the physical—it’s about feeling truly connected. When that fades, couples can end up feeling like strangers, even when they’re side by side. This disconnection cascades into other areas of the couple’s lives, often spurring on heated arguments, resentment, and distance.

Couples who have problems with intimacy and sex can feel distant all the time. Evenings once spent cuddling now involve scrolling phones in silence or watching separate shows. Attempts at deeper talks fizzle out, leaving a quiet ache of loneliness. 

What skill helps couples with intimacy and sex issues?

Within an EFT framework, couples work on naming and sharing their vulnerable feelings—like the longing to feel wanted or close again. By opening up, they start to mend the emotional distance and rediscover their bond. The issue isn’t usually with sex itself, but with obstacles to emotional closeness or safety that have built up over time, even from before the start of the relationship. Couples can learn the skill of making room to talk about their fears, insecurities, and even resentments. This can help couples move through these issues and create intimacy again.

#4: Life Transitions

Pasadena Couples on Life Transitions:

“Since we moved here for work, it’s like we’re strangers arguing all the time.” 

How do life transitions impact couples in Pasadena?

Major life changes—whether it’s a new baby, a move, or a career shift—can throw a relationship off balance. Couples might struggle to adapt, feeling out of sync with each other. 

For example, after having a baby, one partner feels swamped by diaper duty while the other feels pushed aside. What starts as a discussion about chores turns into a heated argument about who’s sacrificing more. The new change puts stress on the relationship, exposing cracks that usually remain suppressed.

What skill helps couples through life transitions?

In therapy couples learn to express how these changes stir up attachment fears—like feeling abandoned or overwhelmed. They learn to ask for support and offer comfort, keeping their connection strong through the storm. This skill makes the difference between being overwhelmed and disconnected, and being close and safe together.

#5: Addiction

Pasadena Couples on Addiction:

“I never thought my partner’s drinking would affect us this much. It’s like we’re constantly walking on eggshells, and I don’t know how to help anymore.” 

How Addiction impacts Couples in Pasadena

Addiction—whether to substances, gambling, or behaviors—can devastate a relationship, creating a web of codependency, mistrust, and emotional pain. It’s a common reason couples seek help, as it erodes the foundation of their bond. 

For example, one partner comes home late, again, smelling of alcohol. The other, exhausted and hurt, tries to confont them, but it ends in defensiveness and withdrawal. The cycle repeats, leaving both feeling trapped and helpless. Sometimes one partner will feel like it’s all up to them to help the other stop the addiction or get help, creating resentment and further issues.

What skill helps couples overcome addiction wounds?

In couples therapy, couples learn to explore the emotional triggers and unmet attachment needs driving the addiction. Therapy creates a safe space for both to express their pain and fears, helping them rebuild trust and address the root causes together. This core skill is the domino that helps couples create further change and address the addiction pattern long term. Our therapist, McKenzie Laird, works often with couples in this situation.

Quick Guide to Pasadena Couples Therapy Issues

Here’s a quick snapshot of these challenges in a table, summarizing the reasons couples in Pasadena are seeking therapy. These insights are generated from forums and reviews from couples in Pasadena:

The Eaton Fire Has Stressed Relationships in Pasadena

Beyond these everyday struggles, external stressors can push relationships to their breaking point—or their turning point. The Eaton fire, a devastating wildfire that struck Pasadena in January 2025, is a prime example. With evacuations, destroyed homes, and a shaken community, this disaster added a layer of stress that many couples weren’t prepared for. While specific stories from the Eaton fire are still emerging, the general impact of such catastrophes on relationships is clear: they can put unwanted stress on a relationship.

The stress of fleeing your home, losing property, or simply living with the uncertainty of recovery can bring underlying issues to the surface. Couples might argue more over money as they face financial strain, feel disconnected while processing their own trauma, or struggle to support each other when they’re both barely holding on. It’s a pressure cooker that can amplify communication breakdowns, trust issues, or emotional distance.

Yet, catastrophes can also be transformative. When couples open themselves up to the moment—acknowledging the pain and leaning into each other—they can find a new perspective. The Eaton fire might have challenged your relationship, but it can also be a chance to change and build something stronger. In therapy, EFT helps couples turn toward each other, express their fears and needs, and find comfort in their partnership amid the chaos. It’s not about pretending the stress doesn’t exist—it’s about facing it together and letting it reshape your bond for the better.

How to Start Couples Therapy in Pasadena

Still on the fence? Let’s bust some myths. Therapy isn’t just for “failing” couples—it’s for anyone who wants to grow. Studies show it works: couples therapy can boost satisfaction and connection, often with lasting results (Lebow et al., 2020). It’s not a magic fix, but it’s a space to figure things out together. And in a city like Pasadena, where therapists are plenty and options range from affordable to specialized, help is closer than you think.

We have in-person sessions available for couples therapy in Pasadena. Click the links below to find a therapist and schedule a free consultation: