Teen girl achieving success in school due to proven ADHD strategies
Managing emotions, Parenting

Screen Time Cripples Teen Girls’ Mental Health: How to Replace Social Media with Belonging

Written by Addy Sonneland

Imagine your teenage daughter scrolling endlessly on her phone late into the night, her face lit by the glow, but her mood darkening with each swipe. She seems more withdrawn, anxious about school or friends, and you’re left wondering if all that time online is taking a toll. If this scenario feels familiar, you’re not alone—many parents in Pasadena notice these shifts as screen time rises. Research increasingly links excessive screen use to mental health struggles in adolescent girls, from heightened depression to disrupted sleep.

In this post, we’ll explore research findings on screen time’s impact, categorize the top 3 negative effects on teenage girls with real examples, overview proven strategies to limit it, and highlight studies on replacing screens with in-person activities for positive change. Drawing from experts like Gabor Maté on trauma and disconnection, this can lead to less worry at home and healthier teens—let’s get started.

Research Findings on Screen Time’s Impact on Adolescent Girls’ Mental Health

Recent studies paint a concerning yet hopeful picture: Excessive screen time correlates with poorer mental health in teens, particularly girls, but awareness opens doors to change. As a parent watching your daughter navigate this digital world, it’s natural to feel a mix of worry and determination—let’s unpack what the data shows.

Key Studies Linking Screen Time to Mental Health Risks

A June 2025 APA study found each hour of screen time boosts depressive symptoms severity in adolescents, like a slow-building storm cloud over their emotional skies. CDC research from July 2025 linked high screen use to worse health outcomes, including mental distress, painting a vivid image of teens trapped in a cycle of scrolling and sadness. A 2025 meta-analysis showed screen time positively associated with depressive, anxiety, and stress symptoms, reminding us how these devices, meant to connect, can sometimes isolate our kids in invisible ways.

Girls’ Heightened Vulnerability in Screen Time Research

Girls appear more vulnerable: A UCSF study noted preteens with more screens face higher depression/anxiety later, especially girls, as if the constant comparisons act like mirrors distorting their self-view. Pew’s 2025 report tied social media to teen mental health woes, with girls reporting more negative impacts, evoking the heartache of seeing your daughter dim her light to match filtered ideals. Maté aligns this with healing emotional wounds through presence, fostering resilience against hypervigilance from rejection fears, offering hope that mindful interventions can turn the tide.

Broader Implications from Screen Time Studies

Overall, while moderate use may aid learning, over 2-3 hours daily—especially social media—heightens risks, per a 2025 BMC study, like a gentle stream turning into a raging river that erodes emotional stability. Girls show stronger links due to social comparison and cyberbullying. Maté warns, “Screens displace vital bonds,” compounding trauma through isolation, but this also highlights the power of real-world connections to rebuild what feels lost.

Top 3 Negative Impacts of Screen Time on Teenage Girls

From the research, three key negative impacts stand out for teenage girls, often more pronounced due to social dynamics. Here’s a breakdown with examples—think of these as warning signs, like storm clouds gathering, signaling it’s time for supportive action:

ImpactDescription & Examples
1. Increased Depression & Suicidal ThoughtsExcessive screens, especially social media, correlate with higher depressive symptoms and suicide risk in girls. A 2025 study found girls using phones 5+ hours/day 71% more likely for suicidal thoughts. Examples: Constant comparisons lead to low self-worth; one X parent shared, “My daughter cries over Instagram ‘perfect lives’—now she’s withdrawn and talks negatively about herself.” Maté links this to disconnection: “Trauma is…disconnection from ourselves,” fueled by virtual validation over real bonds.
2. Heightened Anxiety & StressScreens boost anxiety symptoms, with girls showing stronger associations. A 2025 analysis linked screen time to stress/depression in adolescents. Examples: FOMO from feeds causes restlessness; Reddit parents report, “My teen girl panics over unread messages, leading to sleep loss and school avoidance.” Maté notes addictive use as self-soothing gone awry, worsening emotional regulation.
3. Disrupted Sleep & Emotional ProblemsScreens interfere with sleep, linking to mood issues; a 2025 study showed addictive use triples suicide risk via poor rest. Examples: Late-night scrolling causes fatigue/irritability; X discussions highlight “grumpy mornings from TikTok binges.” Maté emphasizes this as compounding trauma through isolation: “High screen time…increases severity of depressive symptoms.”

These impacts create vicious cycles. Screens displace real interactions, deepening disconnection—Maté warns, “Close relationships are the center of a happy life,” yet screens often sabotage them.

Proven Strategies to Limit Screen Time Effectively in Teens

To counter these effects, parents can adopt research-backed strategies for limiting screen time, focusing on balance and alternatives. These approaches emphasize family involvement and positive replacements, creating a nurturing environment where teens feel supported rather than restricted.

Establish Family Agreements on Screen Limits

Set daily guidelines collaboratively, like 1-2 hours non-educational use, using apps for enforcement. A WHO report shows this aids mental health by reducing exposure. Maté supports: “Mindful limits foster presence.”

Make sure boundaries on screen time are co-created. Limits set by parents and communicated unilaterally to teens can create a power struggle filled with resentments. To avoid conflict, yet still create change, try including your teen in creating the screen time boundary:

  1. Present the problem. Tell your teen about the problem you see with the current arrangement with screens. Present the problem in light of your desire for their happiness and growth. For example, you might say, “I notice that you don’t do your normal hobbies after school much because of screens get in the way, then you get irritable when later you don’t have time to do these things that are really life-giving to you.”
  2. Connect with their goal. Ask your teen about how they feel about screen usage and if they were to make a change, what benefit it might have for them.
  3. Tell them your goal. Align with their goal while also stating what you’d like to change: “I agree and want you to grow in that way too. I feel it’s time we make a change with screen time so we can get there.
  4. Enlist their help. “Before I create a boundary, I thought I could get your ideas about the easiest way we could make a good change. What ideas do you have on how we could do screens differently that would make room for your hobbies and friends?”
  5. Negotiate. It’s ok to not just take their first idea. If it feels too mild or unrealistic, it can be intellectually engaging and respectful of their autonomy to be honest about concerns or questions you have, so they can adjust their idea with you: “Well I’m worried if we just limit screen usage after 9pm, we’re not making a change in the part of the day when it counts the most. How can we adjust it?”
  6. Make it pragmatic. Create a boundary that’s easy to remember and easy to enforce. Simple is better. Make a reminder next week on your calendar to check in about the new boundary and see what adjustments you need to make together.

Create Tech-Free Zones and Times

Designate bedrooms/meals as screen-free to improve sleep and interactions. Studies link this to lower anxiety; BMC research confirms reduced emotional distress. Imagine family dinners becoming warm havens of conversation, where laughter replaces notifications, helping your teen unwind naturally.

Model Healthy Screen Habits

Parents limiting their use sets examples—Pew notes teens mirror adults, aiding regulation. Encourage discussions on media’s “perfection” to combat comparison. Picture evenings where everyone plugs in devices together, modeling balance and opening doors to heartfelt talks about the day’s highs and lows.

Promote Offline Hobbies and Monitoring

Introduce sports/arts; BMC studies show exercise mitigates harms. Monitor content gently to address cyber issues. Envision your daughter trading scrolls for a dance class, her energy channeled into joy, with you cheering from the sidelines—small steps fostering resilience and fun.

Positive Outcomes from Replacing Screen Time with In-Person Activities for Girls

Research shows swapping screens for in-person activities markedly improves mental health, especially for girls, like sunlight breaking through clouds after a storm. A 2020 UBC study found teens (including girls) with more extracurriculars and less screen time had better mental health, reducing depression by promoting belonging. A 2022 UK study linked replacing screens with exercise to lowered emotional distress in teens, with girls showing greater benefits from social bonds, evoking the warmth of real friendships over digital likes.

A PLoS One meta-analysis noted “green time” (outdoor social activities) countered screen harms, improving well-being in adolescents by fostering real connections, as if nurturing a garden where self-esteem blooms. For girls, in-person interactions mitigate comparison anxiety from social media—Maté notes this rebuilds self-connection: “Screens displace vital bonds.” Examples: Group sports reduced loneliness in a BMC study, with girls reporting 50% less depressive symptoms, painting a vivid scene of laughter on the field replacing solitary scrolls.

Guidelines for Implementing Screen Limits and Replacements Step-by-Step

To apply this with care, approach as a team effort, like guiding your daughter through a foggy path toward clearer skies:

  1. Assess Usage: Track screen time family-wide—discuss impacts openly, perhaps over ice cream, to make it feel supportive rather than accusatory.
  2. Set Boundaries: Agree on limits (e.g., no phones at dinner); introduce in-person alternatives like family walks, starting small to build enthusiasm.
  3. Monitor & Adjust: Use apps for enforcement; celebrate successes with group activities like board games, adjusting based on her feedback to ensure it feels collaborative.

Screen time’s toll on girls’ mental health is real, but limits and social replacements offer hope, like planting seeds for a brighter future. At Here Counseling in Pasadena, we help families navigate this through somatic therapy for embodied healing, addressing disconnection with warmth and tools tailored to your teen’s needs.

Ready to support your teen? Contact Here Counseling today—healthier habits await.

FAQ: Screen Time Impact on Adolescent Girls’ Mental Health

What is screen time’s impact on adolescent girls’ mental health?

Excessive screen time correlates with higher depression, anxiety, and sleep issues in girls; studies show social media amplifies comparison and stress.

Negative effects of screen time on teenage girls?

Top effects include increased depression/suicide risk, anxiety/stress, and disrupted sleep/emotional problems; research links 2+ hours daily to worsened symptoms.

How to limit screen time for teens?

Set family agreements on daily limits, create tech-free zones, and model behavior; encourage hobbies to replace screens effectively.

Benefits of replacing screen time with in-person activities?

Replacing screens with social activities reduces depression and boosts well-being; studies show extracurriculars cut emotional distress in teens.

Seek therapy if symptoms like persistent anxiety or withdrawal last over 2 weeks or disrupt daily life; early intervention prevents escalation.

Certified Somatic Therapy in Pasadena
Addy Sonneland, Somatic Therapy

Hi, I’m Addy. I work with teens and families to break cycles of anxiety, conflict, and miscommunication. Helping teens heal from anxiety means working on more than just thoughts—it’s also about teaching their bodies to feel safe and regulated. Using somatic therapy techniques, I guide teens in noticing and shifting what’s happening inside, so they can break free from old patterns and discover their innate strengths. We work together with their families to create new ways of relating and supporting each other, building patterns that serve them for a lifetime of confidence, resilience, and connection.

Learn more about teen therapy with Addy

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Anxiety, Managing emotions, Parenting, Somatic Exercises

Your Teen Overwhelmed by Back-to-School Anxiety? 3 Signs, 3 Parenting Pitfalls, and 3 Ways to Help Your Teen Succeed

Written by Addy Sonneland

Picture your teen pacing the kitchen the night before school starts, clutching their stomach and snapping at small questions, their usual spark dimmed by worry. As summer ends and routines resume in Pasadena, anxiety surges, overwhelming many adolescents with restlessness or tears. Back-to-school transitions stir deep fears in teens, from social pressures to academic demands.

In this post, we’ll explore 3 common symptoms teens show from back-to-school anxiety, explaining each with real examples and internal dynamics via interpersonal neurobiology and adolescent development research. Then, we’ll cover common parent missteps that heighten anxiety and effective strategies to support without removing stressors. Understanding these can lead to less tension at home and more resilient kids—let’s begin.

Sign #1: Physical Complaints Signal Back-to-School Anxiety

Parents often notice teens complaining of headaches, stomachaches, or muscle tension as school approaches, turning mornings into battles of persuasion. One Reddit parent shared, “My 13-year-old woke up with stomach cramps every day last week, saying ‘I can’t face school’—it’s clearly nerves about new teachers.” Social media posts describe “teens faking sick to skip the bus,” with symptoms like nausea peaking during back-to-school prep, disrupting family flow. These physical signs can linger into afternoons, with teens rubbing temples or curling up, signaling deep unease.

These bodily responses reflect a nervous system on high alert. Anxiety triggers the body’s stress response, releasing cortisol that manifests as pain. This is partially because the brain’s prefrontal cortex, responsible for regulation, is still maturing. Research from a 2023 CDC study shows 1 in 3 teens experience somatic symptoms from school-related stress, as the developing brain prioritizes survival over comfort. Internally, they’re wrestling with perceived threats—new social hierarchies or academic rigor—needing a safe outlet to process.

Sign #2: Avoidance Behaviors Reflect School Anxiety Struggles

Some teens resist attending school, faking illness or begging to stay home, transforming daily routines into emotional standoffs. A parent on Reddit detailed, “My 15-year-old refuses to get out of bed, claiming ‘I’m too sick’—it’s really panic about cliques and tests every morning.” X examples include “teens melting down at drop-off,” with avoidance escalating to missed days, leaving parents torn between discipline and concern. This can extend to avoiding homework or social events, creating a ripple of tension.

From an interpersonal neurobiology lens, avoidance stems from the amygdala hijacking the brain’s executive functions, perceiving school as a danger zone due to unfamiliarity or past bullying. Adolescent development research from a 2023 McLean Hospital study indicates hormonal shifts heighten this fight-or-flight response in 5-10% of anxious teens, as the still-developing prefrontal cortex struggles to override fear. Internally, they’re stuck in a loop of dread, needing a bridge back to safety without force.

Sign #3: Irritability Means Hidden Back-to-School Anxiety

Anxiety often surfaces as irritability, with teens snapping at siblings or parents over trivial issues, disrupting home harmony. One Reddit parent recounted, “My 14-year-old explodes after school—yelling about homework or a messy room, but it’s really ‘what if I fail?’ fears spilling out.” Social media posts describe “teens slamming doors post-bus,” with daily “mood swings” from unspoken worries, leaving families navigating a minefield of emotions.

Interpersonally, this reflects an immature emotional regulation system, where the limbic system’s reactivity outpaces prefrontal control, per a 2023 APA study noting a 30% rise in teen irritability during school transitions. Developmentally, puberty’s hormonal surge amplifies this, turning anxiety into a pressure cooker that bursts with frustration. Internally, they’re overwhelmed by new demands, needing a release valve for pent-up stress.

Common Parent Missteps That Worsen Teen Anxiety Symptoms

Well-meaning parents can unintentionally heighten teen anxiety through reactive or protective responses, creating unintended harm. These missteps often stem from a desire to alleviate distress but end up reinforcing dependency or fear.

1. Over-Functioning and Babying Teens

Taking over tasks like completing homework or driving them to avoid school amplifies reliance, as a 2023 Mott Children’s study found 25% increased dependence when parents over-function. For example, a parent might say, “I’ll do your project—don’t worry,” leaving the teen feeling incapable, deepening anxiety about facing challenges alone.

2. Becoming Cold and Punitive

Responding with harshness, like “Stop whining and go to school!” triggers more fear, per a 2023 Bryson-led study showing 40% increased dysregulation with punishment. A parent might ground a teen for avoidance, escalating tension—imagine a teen retreating further, feeling rejected instead of supported.

3. Ignoring Emotional Cues

Dismissing complaints with “It’s just nerves, get over it” invalidates their experience, per a 2024 AACAP report linking ignored emotions to 30% higher stress. For instance, brushing off a stomachache might push a teen to bottle up fears, worsening internal chaos.

These pitfalls trap teens in anxiety loops, where overprotection or punishment erodes their ability to self-regulate, leaving parents frustrated and teens more overwhelmed.

Effective Parent Strategies to Support Anxious Teens Without Removing Stressors

Instead of fixing problems, parents can empower teens to navigate anxiety with supportive strategies, fostering resilience and independence while maintaining safety.

1. Offer a Calm Presence for Emotional Regulation

Be a steady anchor, modeling deep breaths during overwhelm to integrate their nervous system—try “Let’s breathe together when it feels big.” A 2024 Compass Health study shows 40% reduced avoidance with this co-regulation, helping teens feel secure to face school.

2. Validate Feelings and Co-Create Solutions

Sit with their emotions, saying “This is tough—how can we tackle it?” to co-create plans, per a 2024 AACAP guide cutting stress by 30% with autonomy. For example, brainstorm a morning checklist together, giving them ownership while easing transition fears.

3. Encourage Structured Outlets for Expression

Guide them to outlets like journaling or sports, offering “Want to write it out or kick a ball?” A 2024 Cedars-Sinai report notes 35% fewer outbursts with structured release, building skills to process anxiety independently.

Parenting StrategyExampleEffect on ChildReference
Offer a Calm Presence“Let’s take deep breaths when you feel overwhelmed about school.”40% reduced avoidance2024 Compass Health study
Validate Feelings and Co-Create“I see you’re worried—let’s plan your morning together.”30% stress reduction2024 AACAP guide
Encourage Structured Outlets“Want to journal or play soccer to unwind after school?”35% fewer outbursts2024 Cedars-Sinai study
Over-Functioning and Babying“I’ll do your project—don’t worry.”25% increased dependence2023 Mott Children’s study
Becoming Cold and Punitive“Stop whining and go to school!”40% increased dysregulation2023 Bryson-led study
Ignoring Emotional Cues“It’s just nerves, get over it.”30% higher stress2024 AACAP report

Guidelines for Seeking Therapy: When Teen Anxiety Warrants Professional Support

Normal anxiety fades; persistent symptoms need attention. Seek therapy if: Symptoms last over 2 weeks, disrupting school or sleep (e.g., refusal, insomnia); physical complaints persist; or self-harm thoughts emerge, per 2023 AACAP guidelines. Early intervention prevents escalation—Pasadena therapists like Here Counseling offer specialized support.

Supporting Teen Transitions: Therapy Eases Back-to-School Anxiety

These challenges are growth opportunities—understanding fosters empathy. At Here Counseling in Pasadena, we help families through somatic therapy for calm integration.

Ready to support your teen? Contact Here Counseling today—brighter days await.

FAQ: Teen Back-to-School Anxiety Symptoms

What are common anxiety symptoms in teens returning to school?

Common symptoms include physical complaints, avoidance behaviors, and irritability; they arise from anxiety overwhelming the nervous system during transitions.

How does anxiety cause physical symptoms in teens?

Anxiety triggers bodily distress like headaches as the nervous system overreacts; research shows this peaks during school stress, needing calm support to ease.

Why do anxious teens avoid school?

Avoidance stems from anxiety viewing school as a threat; developmental studies link this to fear responses, eased by gradual exposure with empathy.

What causes teen irritability from school anxiety?

Irritability is anxiety’s overflow from stress; adolescent brain changes amplify this, requiring patience and outlets to restore balance.

When to seek therapy for teen back-to-school anxiety?

Seek therapy if symptoms persist 2+ weeks, disrupt daily life, or include self-harm; early help like counseling prevents escalation per AACAP guidelines.

Certified Somatic Therapy in Pasadena
Addy Sonneland, Somatic Therapy

Hi, I’m Addy. I work with teens and families to break cycles of anxiety. Helping teens heal from anxiety means working on more than just thoughts—it’s also about teaching their bodies to feel safe and regulated. Using somatic therapy techniques, I guide teens in noticing and shifting what’s happening inside, so they can break free from old patterns and discover their innate strengths. We work together with their families to create new ways of relating and supporting each other, building patterns that serve them for a lifetime of confidence, resilience, and connection.

Learn more about teen therapy with Addy

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Somatic Therapy; Anxiety; Panic Attacks
Managing emotions

5 Somatic Therapy Tools for Calming Panic Attacks

Written by Addy Sonneland
Somatic Therapy; Anxiety; Panic Attacks

Panic attacks can feel overwhelming, sudden, and out of your control. Your heart races, your chest tightens, your breath shortens, and it can feel like something terrible is about to happen—even if there’s no clear danger in front of you. While these intense experiences are deeply disruptive, they are not signs of weakness or brokenness. Your nervous system is fighting to protect you.

In somatic therapy, we understand panic attacks as the body going into survival overdrive. The nervous system is responding to a real or perceived threat, flooding the brain with signals that it’s not safe. But just as the body can be activated into a fight-or-flight response, it can also be gently guided back into a state of regulation and calm.

Let’s explore how somatic practices can support you in moments of panic—offering your nervous system the safety and care it needs to complete the trauma response and come back to balance.

Why Panic Attacks Happen: A Nervous System Perspective

When a panic attack strikes, it’s not just “in your head”—your entire nervous system is activated. This is your body’s ancient survival response kicking in. It prepares you to fight, flee, or freeze in response to perceived danger.

Common physical symptoms of panic include:

  • Rapid heartbeat
  • Chest tightness
  • Racing thoughts
  • Trembling or shaking
  • Dizziness or hyperventilation

These reactions are not random—they are survival energy moving through your system. And with the right tools, you can help that energy discharge safely, instead of staying stuck.

You Don’t Have to Manage Panic Alone

If panic attacks are disrupting your life, therapy can help you feel safer in your body again. Reach out today to explore somatic tools that truly support you.

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The Somatic Shift: Meet Panic with Compassion, Not Fear

What if, instead of fighting the panic or trying to shut it down, you learned to meet it with presence and care?

When we respond to panic with curiosity, compassion, and somatic tools, we invite the nervous system to complete what it started—to finish the trauma response and return to regulation. This process is at the heart of somatic therapy.

Below are several somatic practices that can soothe the nervous system during a panic attack and help it remember safety.

Somatic Practices for Panic Relief

1. Ice Packs Under the Armpits

Placing ice packs or even cold compresses under your arms can initiate the diving reflex—a powerful response that slows your heart rate and stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system (your body’s calming system). The diving reflex redirects oxygen-rich blood back toward vital organs like the heart and lungs instead of outer extremities.

This sudden cold exposure also shocks your brain into focusing on a new, non-threatening sensation, which can help interrupt the panic loop.

2. Deep Vocalization (or Shaking)

Making low, resonant sounds like a long sigh, deep hum, groan, or primal yell can activate the vagus nerve, which is a key player in nervous system regulation. These sounds signal to your brain: “I am safe. I am grounded.” Shaking—like literally letting your arms, legs, or whole body tremble—is another natural way to discharge adrenaline and survival energy stored in the body. Somatic trauma expert, Peter Levine, describes this process as re-channeling the survival energy into an active response that returns the body to safety.

3. Chew Gum (or Pretend to Chew)

The brain associates chewing with eating, and we don’t eat when we’re in danger. Chewing activates the rest-and-digest part of the nervous system and signals safety. Even pretending or mimicking chewing can begin to send calming signals to your brain and body. This simple action can help shift you out of a stress response by mimicking a non-threatening behavior. It’s especially helpful in public spaces where more obvious somatic tools might not feel accessible.

4. Wall Pushes for Strength and Stability

Pushing your palms firmly into a wall, with steady pressure, can help anchor you in your body. When pushing against a wall, we engage the fight response– particularly deep core muscles like the psoas, which are strongly linked to the stress response. Pushing sends a signal to your brain that you are strong, capable, and present.

5. Suck on Sour or Spicy Candy

Panic loops tend to keep the brain . A sudden strong sensory input—like a sour lemon candy or spicy flavor—gives your brain something new and intense to focus on, interrupting the cycle. But beyond just being a distraction, sucking itself is a powerful somatic act. From infancy, sucking is one of the first self-soothing mechanisms we develop. It’s rhythmic, repetitive, and deeply regulating. Engaging this reflex as an adult can stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system, specifically the vagus nerve, helping the body shift from a state of high alert to one of calm and rest. This simple action can reconnect you to a felt sense of comfort and safety—rooted in the earliest ways our bodies learned to self-regulate.

Rewiring the Nervous System Over Time

If panic or anxiety is a regular part of your life, these tools can offer immediate disruption of the pain cycle—but they are not a cure-all. Ongoing panic may be a sign that your nervous system is stuck in survival mode and hasn’t learned how to return to a state of rest and regulation.

This is where somatic therapy can be transformative. Through consistent work with a trained therapist, you can begin to:

  • Release stored trauma
  • Complete unfinished survival responses
  • Rewire your nervous system for safety, peace, and resilience

You Are Not Broken—You’re Wired for Protection

Panic is not a flaw. It’s your body trying to protect you.

And with somatic support, your system can learn that it’s safe to let the alarm settle.

If you’re ready for deeper healing—beyond just managing symptoms—somatic therapy can help you feel safe in your body again.

Interested in working together to support your nervous system healing?
Schedule a free phone consultation to learn more about somatic therapy and how it can help you move from survival to safety.

Learn more about Somatic Therapy with Addy

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Somatic Therapy for Dissociation
Managing emotions, Somatic Exercises

How to Treat Dissociation: Why Somatic Therapy Heals Trauma Best

Written by Addy Sonneland

By Addy Sonneland, AMFT

Dissociation is a common yet often misunderstood psychological response, especially among those who have experienced trauma. At its core, dissociation is a disconnection—a split between the mind and the body, or between thoughts, memories, and one’s sense of identity. For many, it can feel like zoning out, feeling foggy, or even watching oneself from outside the body. Dr. Bessel van Der Kolk describes dissociation as, “a temporary putting aside, not knowing, and not noticing“. While this response can be protective in moments of overwhelm, chronic dissociation can create challenges in daily life, relationships, and overall well-being.

What Are the Symptoms of Dissociation?

  • Feeling disconnected from yourself and your body
  • Feeling disconnected from reality and your surroundings
  • Gaps in memory
  • Time feels like it is moving too fast or too slow
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Emotional numbness
  • Feeling like the world around you is not real
  • Zoning out for periods of time

What Causes Dissociation?

Dissociation exists on a spectrum. On one end, there are mild forms, like daydreaming or losing track of time while driving. On the other, more severe forms include depersonalization (feeling detached from yourself) and derealization (feeling like the world isn’t real). For trauma survivors, dissociation can become a survival strategy—an unconscious way the nervous system protects itself from pain, fear, or helplessness. Our nervous system can cycle through feeling hyperactive (or “jumpy”) to feeling nothing at all. However, when this coping mechanism persists long after the threat has passed, it can keep people disconnected from their feelings, sensations, and sense of self.

Schedule a Call with Addy This Week

Somatic therapy can help you recover from dissociation. I’m Addy Sonneland, and I’m available in Los Angeles and Pasadena to help you heal through somatic therapy.

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The Role of Somatic Therapy

Somatic therapy offers a pathway out of dissociation by helping individuals reconnect with their bodies. “Somatic” comes from the Greek word soma, meaning body. Unlike talk therapy alone, somatic approaches incorporate body awareness, movement, breath, and sensation as part of the healing process.

4 Somatic Practices to Help Dissociation

Somatic therapy offers practical, body-centered tools to help bridge the gap between mind and body when dissociation takes hold. Here are key practices that gently invite you back into presence:

1. Grounding Exercises

Grounding helps anchor you in the present moment, providing a safe “anchor” when feelings of dissociation start to surface. Examples include:

  • Feeling your feet firmly on the floor and noticing the sensation of contact.
  • Holding a textured object like a smooth stone or fabric and focusing on its texture, temperature, and weight.
  • Naming five things you see, four things you hear, three things you can touch, two things you smell, and one thing you taste (the “5-4-3-2-1” technique)

These exercises reconnect your mind with your immediate environment, interrupting the foggy or detached experience of dissociation by stimulating your senses.

2. Breathwork

Your breath is a powerful tool to regulate your nervous system and reduce feelings of overwhelm that feed dissociation. Techniques such as:

  • Box breathing (inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4).
  • Slow, deep belly breathing that encourages the parasympathetic nervous system (your “rest and digest” mode) to activate.

By slowing and deepening the breath, you signal safety to your body, helping to calm hyperarousal and ease dissociative symptoms.

3. Body Scans

Body scans encourage you to notice sensations throughout your body without judgment or the need to “fix” anything. This practice builds interoception — the ability to sense internal bodily states — which is often dulled in dissociation. A typical body scan might involve:

  • Slowly directing your attention from your feet to your head, noticing areas of tension, warmth, coolness, or neutrality.
  • Observing any discomfort or pleasant sensations and accepting them as they are.

This mindful connection to your body rebuilds the bridge between mind and body, helping you regain a sense of embodied presence.

4. Movement

Gentle, intentional movement can release trauma held in muscles and restore a sense of safety within your body. Movement can be as simple as:

  • Stretching tight areas, like your neck or shoulders.
  • Walking mindfully, noticing each step and the movement in your legs.
  • Participating in yoga, dance, or tai chi, which combine movement with breath and awareness.

Movement helps dissolve tension and stuck energy, fostering a grounded sense of self and easing dissociative states.

Mindfulness and Safe Touch

Mindfulness cultivates a compassionate awareness of your thoughts, emotions, and sensations as they arise, helping reduce the “auto-pilot” feeling of dissociation. Pairing mindfulness with safe touch—like placing a hand on your heart or gently hugging yourself—can provide comfort and reassurance.

These acts create a feeling of safety and presence, reminding your nervous system that it’s okay to be in the body and experience emotions without danger.

Reconnecting with the Body

Healing dissociation isn’t about forcing presence or pushing through discomfort. It’s about creating a safe container where the body can slowly become a place of connection rather than fear. Somatic therapy helps build this safety over time, often in small, titrated steps.

The process of reconnection might look like:

  • Noticing when you’ve checked out—and gently bringing yourself back.
  • Building tolerance for sensation without judgment.
  • Developing curiosity and compassion toward your body’s responses.
  • Creating new experiences of embodiment.

The Role of Nervous System Regulation in Healing Dissociation

Dissociation often stems from a nervous system overwhelmed by threat and trauma. Somatic therapy works by teaching the body to regulate its own stress responses.

  • Somatic Experiencing (SE): This approach helps you notice sensations related to trauma, allowing the nervous system to complete its natural “reset” without becoming overwhelmed.
  • Titration: Rather than diving into trauma all at once, titration breaks down the experience into manageable parts, helping avoid retraumatization.
  • Resourcing: Developing internal (breath, mindfulness) and external (safe people, places) supports that help you feel grounded and stable.

With time, nervous system regulation lessens the need for dissociation as a defense mechanism and encourages a gentle return to presence.

Why Professional Support Matters for Healing Dissociation

Healing dissociation isn’t something you need to do alone. Working with a therapist who understands trauma and somatic approaches ensures:

  • Safety: Therapists create a safe, non-judgmental space where you can explore difficult feelings at your own pace.
  • Personalized Care: A therapist can tailor somatic practices to your unique needs and monitor your nervous system’s responses.
  • Integration: Professional guidance supports the reintegration of dissociated parts of yourself and helps translate insights into everyday life.
  • Hope and Patience: Healing is a gradual process—having a supportive guide makes all the difference.

Seeking help is a courageous and essential step toward reclaiming your presence and wholeness.

Why Somatic Therapy Works

The body holds our trauma, but it also holds the key to healing. Somatic therapy recognizes that trauma is not just stored in memories or thoughts—it’s embedded in our nervous system, posture, breath, and muscle patterns. By working with the body directly, we can shift these patterns and restore a sense of wholeness.

Somatic therapy doesn’t promise quick fixes, but it does offer profound tools for lasting change. By tuning in to the body, we reclaim agency, resilience, and a deeper sense of self. For many people, the journey out of dissociation involves building the capacity to stay with what’s happening in the moment—sensations, emotions, relationships—without becoming overwhelmed. Somatic therapy is particularly powerful because it works with the very system that dissociation affects: the nervous system.

Can Dissociation be Cured?

Dissociation isn’t a life sentence, but rather a sign that your system did exactly what it needed to survive at the time. While it may not always “disappear” entirely, it can absolutely be softened, managed, and even transformed. Healing from dissociation is not about erasing your past or pretending the disconnection never happened—it’s about learning to be present in your life again, on your own terms.

Over time, with consistent support, people often find that the fog lifts. They feel more real, more present, and more able to engage with the world around them. The freeze begins to thaw. They begin to live, rather than just survive. Healing from dissociation is possible. It may take time, patience, and support—but you are not alone, and you are not stuck. With the right tools, the body can learn safety, and the mind can return to presence.

FAQ About Dissociation

Is dissociation the same as daydreaming?
Not exactly. While daydreaming is a mild, common form of dissociation, clinical dissociation—especially related to trauma—is more intense and often involves disruptions in memory, identity, and perception. It can interfere with daily functioning in ways that go far beyond zoning out or getting lost in thought.

Can dissociation happen without trauma?
Yes. While trauma is a common cause, dissociation can also be triggered by extreme stress, anxiety, sleep deprivation, or other overwhelming experiences. However, persistent or intense dissociation often points to deeper roots that are worth exploring with a therapist.

How do I know if I’m dissociating?
Some signs include feeling “spaced out,” disconnected from your body, numb, or like you’re watching your life from the outside. You may also experience memory gaps, feel emotionally flat, or notice time distortion (example: “Where did the last hour go?”).

Do I have to remember or talk about my trauma to heal?
Not necessarily. Somatic therapy focuses more on how trauma lives in the body now, rather than rehashing details of the past. Many people find relief and progress without ever needing to tell their full story. Healing can happen through presence, sensation, and gentle reconnection—not just words.

A gentle note…

If you’ve experienced dissociation, know that it’s a natural and understandable response to overwhelming circumstances. You’re not broken—you’re surviving. And with the right tools and support, it is possible to feel more grounded, connected, and at home in your body again.

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Anxiety, Somatic Exercises

What is Embodiment? 3 Big Myths About Your Mind-Body Connection

Written by Addy Sonneland

You’ve heard of “embodiment” and you are curious how this could work for you. You find yourself stuck in your head, disconnected from your experiences, and just going through the motions. Maybe you have a general understanding of your emotions, but you feel a step or two away from truly feeling them. Stress and trauma have kept you from feeling fully present and moments of dissociation feel like regular occurrences.

You’ve tried the phrases, “mind over matter” or “just shake it off”. You know that feeling tense, numb, and overwhelmed is keeping you from being fully present. Additionally, You want to experience your emotions without feeling hijacked by them. You long to find ease – a desire to walk through life feeling grounded, connected, and comfortable in your own skin. You are longing for embodiment. 

Embodiment is a way of working with the mind-body connection, not by doing something entirely new, but by bringing awareness to what your body is already doing. As somatic trauma therapist, Manuela Mischke Reeds says,

“Embodiment is the awareness process through which we recognize ourselves as interconnected living systems.”

When we cultivate this awareness, we gain wisdom and insight, allowing ourselves to respond authentically and engage fully—both with ourselves and others. In this blog, we’ll explore how emotions take visible form in the body and how tuning into these signals can help you feel more present, grounded, and at home in yourself. Let’s talk more about embodiment and how somatic awareness works. 

3 Common Myths About Embodiment

Many people have misconceptions about what embodiment really is. Let’s clear up some confusion around the most common ones. 

1. Embodiment means always feeling “good” in your body

While embodiment includes focusing on comfortable or soothing sensations, it is not about finding a state of constant comfort or ease. It includes (but is not limited to) awareness of discomfort, tension, or even moments of disconnection from physical sensations. The goal is not to eliminate the feelings, but rather to cultivate curiosity and compassion. 

2. Embodiment is something you achieve once and for all

As amazing as it would be, embodiment is not a final destination. Our awareness of our body and emotions fluctuates throughout the day. Embodiment is an ongoing process of noticing. The power of embodiment is found through returning to awareness again and again, building a relationship between the mind and body over time. 

3. Embodiment is just about movement or posture

While movement plays a role, embodiment is more than standing tall or stretching. It’s about recognizing how emotions show up in the body—like a clenched jaw in frustration or a sense of lightness in joy. Movement can help us learn to work with these sensations rather than ignoring or suppressing them.

3 Truths About Embodiment

Now that we have cleared up some misconceptions, let’s explore what embodiment really is and why it is so important. 

1. Embodiment is for everyone

A history of trauma is not required to benefit from developing somatic awareness. We all navigate stress, emotions, and daily experiences that shape how we feel in our bodies. Embodiment helps correct the tendency to intellectualize emotions—thinking about them rather than actually feeling them. Emotions begin in the body, and they always have a physical manifestation. Through sensory awareness—exteroception (external sensations), proprioception (body position and movement), and interoception (internal bodily signals)—you can learn to recognize and process emotions as they arise. When you do, you ground yourself in the present. 

2. Embodiment is an ongoing practice

It’s not a one-time realization but a long-term process of cultivating awareness to your body’s signals. The more you practice, the more natural it becomes. Over time, you’ll develop a stronger felt sense– your innate, pre-verbal knowledge of the mind-body connection. Instead of relying on “mind over matter,” you’ll recognize when to rest, move, or seek support. This shift leads toward greater authenticity both with yourself and others. 

3. The mind and body are intimately connected

Finally, Your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations are deeply intertwined through the truly brilliant vagus nerve. Dr. Willa Blythe Baker from the Mind & Life Institute notes, “Neuroscience now recognizes that the brain and the body are so intimately intertwined that they cannot be thought of separately.” Embodiment is not just about understanding your emotions but about sensing and processing them through the body. When you lean into embodiment, you move toward wholeness—engaging with life fully rather than slipping into disconnection or overwhelm.

Ready to reconnect with your body?

I help people just like you learn to move from overthinking to deeply feeling – so you can trust yourself, respond authentically, and feel more at home in your body. Embodiment is a process and you don’t have to figure it out alone.

I help people move out of survival mode and toward embodiment. We can work together to help you get there. In somatic therapy, we will use mindful awareness and gentle exploration to tap into your innate strength. This includes noticing body sensations, processing emotions through intentional movement, and inviting your body to tell the story. Your body is already speaking to you, somatic therapy helps you listen. Click below and schedule a free consultation today.

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Managing emotions

Overcome Medical Anxiety: 5 Tips for a Stress-Free Doctor’s Visit

Written by Addy Sonneland

Medical anxiety can make doctor’s appointments feel overwhelming, triggering dread, racing thoughts, and physical tension. If you’re among the one in three people who avoid medical care due to fear, you’re not alone. This article shares five practical steps to reduce medical anxiety, helping you approach appointments with calm and confidence. 

Why Medical Anxiety Feels So Overwhelming

When you have medical anxiety, going to medical appointments can create dread and anticipation. You experience a pit in your stomach, racing thoughts, and muscle tension. The urge to cancel the doctor’s appointment becomes overwhelming. Despite trying to reason away the fear, you find the anxiety amplifies the more you try to overcome it. 

It’s not just about the appointment: it’s the waiting, the uncertainty, the fear of what might happen or the potential of experiencing pain. You are exhausted from the constant worry. You are not alone in feeling this way, 1 in 3 people avoid going to the doctor, even when they need care. While the appointments do not go away, your anxiety about going to doctor’s appointments can dissipate. 

Panicked, you try to handle it yourself, maybe even self-diagnosing or self-medicating to avoid going to the doctor. You find yourself exhausted from trying to manage your health on your own. The more you try to handle it, the more isolated you feel. 

In this article, you will learn 5 tips to decrease medical anxiety and find freedom from worry.

Taking small steps to manage the medical anxiety can create big change.

Let’s talk about some ways to navigate medical anxiety. 

5 Steps to Decrease Medical Anxiety

1. Scheduling: set yourself up for success

To set yourself up for success, try scheduling enjoyable and pleasant activities before and after the appointment. This could be a workout, grabbing coffee with a loved one before the appointment, or calling someone you trust on the way to the appointment. After the appointment, maybe you go for a walk, sit down with your favorite book, or listen to music.

2. What could go right?

Set aside 10-15 minutes a day or two before your appointment to visualize the doctor’s office, the waiting room, and your appointment. Most importantly, visualize yourself moving through the appointment with ease, safety, and comfort. Get detailed and specific in your visualization. Imagine what the chairs feel like, the lighting in the office, and the tone of your doctor’s voice. 

3. Give the medical anxiety a voice

One way to soothe your anxiety is by using your voice to ask questions or express your worry. To increase your sense of agency, prepare questions to ask your doctor. Additionally, use your voice to share your worry with your doctor. Anxiety gets bigger when we keep it to ourselves. Communicating it with your medical team allows them to respond more compassionately, as they explain procedures and address specific concerns. 

4. Trace medical anxiety back to the source

Reflect on when the anxiety started to appear for you? Did you have a bad experience: uncomfortable examination, unfamiliar environment, or negative experience with a doctor? Understanding the beginning of the fear can be a great starting point toward freedom.

5. Build a team you trust

One of the best things you can do is to surround yourself with people who put you at ease and make you feel heard and respected. A caring and compassionate doctor can go a long way toward erasing the fear. Also, inviting a therapist to be on your team can help as you navigate medical anxiety. 

FAQ: Managing Medical Anxiety

Answers to common questions about overcoming medical anxiety:

What is medical anxiety?

Medical anxiety is an intense fear of doctor’s visits, often triggered by uncertainty or past negative experiences. It can cause physical symptoms like a racing heart and lead to avoiding necessary care.

How can I reduce medical anxiety before an appointment?

Schedule enjoyable activities around the visit and visualize a positive experience. Sharing your fears with your doctor also helps reduce anxiety’s grip.

Why do I feel worse when I try to ignore my anxiety?

Suppressing anxiety often makes it stronger, as unaddressed fears grow in isolation. Expressing concerns to your medical team or a therapist can shrink its power.

When should I seek therapy for medical anxiety?

If anxiety prevents you from attending appointments or managing health, therapy is beneficial. A therapist can teach coping strategies to help you feel calmer and more in control.

Get help for medical anxiety

You can walk into the doctor’s office with your shoulders relaxed with a sense of calm grounding you. Even if a spark of anxiety begins to surface, it doesn’t overwhelm you– you know that you will be ok. 

I help people with anxiety experience freedom from anxious thoughts. We can work together to help you get there. Click below and schedule a free consultation today.

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